Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Looking Up, palette knife painting

"Looking Up"
9 x 12 inches
Acrylic on hardboard

Is there such a thing as a little miracle? Or are all miracles a big deal? So many little things, prayed about specifically, have become answered prayers, and some pretty big things too. Sometimes the small ones are so unnoticed to others, yet very extreme to you.
I took a walk the other day, close to sunset, and saw this little hill and the light pouring down. I got down on my knees and saw it from a whole new angle. WOW! The impact and glow was greatly intensified. I tried to capture it here. I used a palette knife for that feeling of time flying by.
Waiting for a surgery date, running many tests, getting put off for who knows how long, watching my husband fade, his mind is shutting down, he is giving up. Another doctor to go and see, then maybe a surgery can be scheduled . . . A small tumor in his ear, now pressing on his brain. So scary. Every day he gets worse.
Things are really looking up these days!
This new doctor looked over the tests, he called, he says we need to do something right away! What an answer to prayer! We go Monday and Tuesday for Gamma Knife surgery. One dose of intense radiation, kills the tumor.
Just like the sun rays, so intense, down on my knees praying for a miracle, and now I see, this is the miracle! This doctor could have put us off too, required a consult like the others, and time is so precious. He saw the need, he is taking us in in just a few days.
The tests are all coming back good, even the arteries in his neck, which had started showing clogging two years ago on one side, they came back clear. another one of those things that we prayed about, because he would have had to have them cleaned out first . . .
I just have to thank God, over and over.
But then all the little things, running into an old friend, exchanging a needed hug, kind words from email buddies, a song that meant the world to you played at just the right time. All around me I see God's hand, it is as if he is telling me he cares, he hears, and my prayers count too. My husband may have given up, but I don't have to. God has the final say!

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3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Fawn, I am so sorry to hear your husband, you and your family are experiencing such difficult times. Sometimes we are so excited to see God answer our prayers as we wish but if not remember he will give us the strength and comfort to endure.
We will continue to pray for a positive outcome.
Sincerely,
Dee in Alabama

Your paintings are lovely and so inspirational.

Fawn McNeill Barr said...

Dee,
Thank you so very much! We are claiming a full recovery! they say it will be a few months of therapy, but he can learn to walk normal again. His brain can be trained to compensate! isn't that amazing? God is so good to make our bodies heal . . .

Roxanne Steed said...

You are both in our prayers for strength & courage!